My husband went to London for a week in my 2ww

So, Ive been having a really hard time today. Well, since last night really. I'm 9dpo today and Taylor will be out of the country until next Thursday. What I'm really nervous about though is his flight. I hate it when he flies. I dont really know why. But it always scares me. Its a 10 hour flight, the longest flight hes ever been on, and hes going over the ocean.... and UGH I'm so nervous! I cried for hours last night telling him how much I love him. And I mean every word of it. He also wont have a working cell phone, so the only way we will be able to talk to each other is by email.... I told him I would take a pic of all of my POAS and post them on here for him to see to keep up with! LOL When I laid the kids down for bed tonight, Xoe said "I wanna go on airplane with Daddy" while crying. It was really sweet....

This week will be interesting.

He went with his dad for work stuff. Blah blah.

I've had 2 years to prepare myself for this. I dont know why its so hard for me. I dont mind that hes there without me. I know if I was there I'd be walking around alone... so, its whatever. I told him to take pics and upload each one of them on our MySpace page so I can see.

So thats on the home front. I dont wanna talk about it too much or I will work myself up again. So let's talk TTC. Like I said, Im 9dpo. I was feeling really sick to my stomach yesterday. Today is just strange. My appetite comes and goes and my nausea comes and goes.... All of my HPTs are negative (which of course they are because I'm testing way too early - but does that stop me? No. Why? Because I'm a POASaholic.) and my OPKs are showing positives and almost positives.... I'm driving myself nuts again. LOL. I love it though. Sometimes I feel a little insane, but I hear you have to be a little insane to stay sane, so that works for me :)

2ww are the worst. I struggle with patience. God told me this would be my year for patience. Ugh. Its held true. I hope He doesnt mean for TTC too.... I found a really awesome bunch of women on a PCOS board. They are really helpful when it comes to letting me vent about stuff. We've only been TTC for 2 yrs, and I know thats not a long time compared to some women who have been TTC for their first child for 10+ years, so I feel almost selfish when I get frustrated.

Taylor told me a few nights ago, that if we dont get pregnant on Clomid we can do all the other tests that Dr wants to run. HSG sonograms and stuff. Which hopefully I'm pregnant right now and I dont even have to think about future stuff like that.

Anyways, I love my family, and I'm done writing for now.....